The Seventh Sense

Who Dat Dude?

Party scene from Hellphone:

 

Hellphone Teaser

The funny thing is.... the guy at the beginning of the trailer?  That was originally going to be my part, but due to scheduling issues, it went to someone else.  I got a different scene.

This is going to be a fun little movie.

David Joy Gets Good Press

Geez.

Best quote:

Jokes Lawson: “Truth be told, he owes all of his success to me, and the rest is history.” Joy plays right along. “It’s true,” he says. “I’m Jamie’s bitch. He works me like a slave driver and I keep coming back for more. I’m a prison bitch.”

The Shoot

I didn't know what was going on.

I knew I had been cast in a very small part in "Hellphone", being shot in Madison, NC.  My original part was one line, spoken into a phone, and then I die.  But a scheduling conflict preventing that from happening.  But they put into another part.  I just had no idea what part, or when it was being shot.

So every morning, I would get by email a call sheet.  And yesterday, I was on it.  I was "John" and I was to be at Dan's Coffee Shop in Madison at 6:30 pm.  That's all I knew.

I arrived there and there were already a bunch of extras in semi-formal dress.  I was in a polo shirt and jeans.  Uh-oh.

Fortunately, Jaye Pierce was there.  I just ended a show with her -- The Great American Trailer Park Musical -- she played my stripper-girlfriend.  Her brother is the director of "Hellphone".  She was there, with much of her family, to be extras.  She had on a snazzy evening dress.

She got a copy of the script, and it turned out to be a scene at a dance hall.  It was a "Support The Troops" benefit where people turn in their cellphones in exchange for a bluetooth phone that fits in your ear.  This is early in the film.  Apparently, outfitting most of the fictional small town with bluetooths is important for the plot -- the demon can now kill them better through the bluetooth.  Or something.

Anyway, as luck would have it, I was able to get myself dressed up, pulling from my Trailer Park costume which was still in my car.  Now it was just a matter of learning my lines.  And knowing when to say them.  One of the lines was "Well, as a vet, I seriously appreciate the community coming together to support our boys."  Dummy me -- it took me a while to realize I was a veteran, and not a veterinarian.

As luck would also have it, the woman playing my wife Sharon, was unable to make the shoot, so Jaye took her place.

Our scene was basically a brief conversation with the lead, Graham (played by Nathan Moore) and Elisha (a reporter who has a crush on Graham, played by Caroline Granger, a Charlotte-based actress).  I talk to Graham about the event, but he is distracted and excuses himself from the conversation.

Shooting was fun.  It was a long process though, because it was a crowd scene.  There was a band and the extras were dancing.  Meanwhile, there's several conversations going on.  So we had to shoot wide shots from various angles.  Then we had to shoot closer shots of particular conversations (including the one I was in).  And you had to remember your movements from the wider shots to the closer ones, which sometimes were shot an hour-and-a-half later. 

Again, Jaye was a big help.  She would remind me, "...and here's where you turn around after I point at the fat lady".  Of course, we had to mime a lot when the camera wasn't on us -- the boom wanted to pick up the main conversation and not all the background noise.  So there was silent talking, silent dancing, etc.

The extras were, uh, interesting.  Some of them had clearly never done it before, but they were very attentive to Jason's direction.  Others seemed to be "extra groupies" -- people who apparently have nothing better to do that to be extras in movies.  Some people drove from Florida and Marylan, just to be in the background of this one 3-minute scene.

Anyway, my scene went off without a serious hitch, and I managed to remember my lines.  Nathan was a great guy and a very good actor.

Jaye had her baby with her, and the baby was acting up, so she had to leave the set shortly after our close-up scene was shot.  They still had more party scenes to shoot (reflecting later on in the evening when the party had died down a little), and since my "wife" was no longer there, it stood to reason that my charactor wouldn't be there either.  So I was done at 11:30 pm.

Nice time.  Hope to see the film itself someday (my co-actor in Rounding Third, Scott Stevens, is playing the demon).  Might even get me on IMDb.

P.S.  Forgot to mention.  My charactor, John, and Jaye's charactor, Sharon, are named after Jaye and Jason's actual parents.  Waiting around to shoot, I asked Jaye if her father had any mannerisms that I could incorporate (you know, just for fun).  Jaye's niece said the he sometimes scratches his chin.  Unfortunately, I forgot to do that on most of the takes, so I'm not sure if my chin-scratch will make the final cut.

"Helen! Helen? Shit. She's Got One Job To Do....."

My one line of dialogue in a full length indepedent film.

I say it into a phone and then I die after I say that.

The working title is "Hellphone" -- it's being shot this fall.  Sundance, here I come!

Where Am I?

Confirmation hearings, the economy still in the tank, and we're STILL learning more about the arrogant law-breaking colossal fuck-up that was the Bush Administration.  Er, the Cheney Administration.

And yet, I'm AWOL.  Not that I don't care.  I just have a lot on my plate.  Sigh.

Greensboro Spared My Rendition of The National Anthem

It was originally supposed to be Scott and me, doing the National Anthem and "Take Me Out To the Ballgame" in front of 6,000 or so Greensboro Grasshopper fans.

Fortunately -- for greater Greensboro, I think -- I have a prior commitment tonight.

I Dream Of Geneology

I’ve been getting into tracing my heritage and, with a few hours to kill last night (that could have been put to better use, but what the hell), I built up on some basic research I had started about a year ago.

I decided to climb up my family tree, and go out on the branch marked “Mother”.  This was all done through ancestry.com, which is cool.  I thought I would share my roots – well, the interesting parts.  Well, the parts that are interesting to me, with a veiled attempt to make it interesting to anyone outside my family who is reading this.

I've decided to "tell my story" on a seprate page of this blog, apart from the regular posts.  I hope to update it periodically.  It's here.

New York Update

Well, the shows are done.  Audiences seemed to like it, although almost everyone who attended was a friend or family member of someone in the cast.... so that doesn't count.

After-show outings were entertaining: HGTV's Libby Langdon ("Small Space, Big Style") took us to a nice restaurant for which she had interior designed (Libby is the daughter of cast member Mary Ann Luedtke).

We also went out with Michael McDonald, who came to our show right after the Tony Award dinner.  Mike, a friend of Joe's (our director), has received his first Tony nomination ever -- for costumes in Hair. 

On Thursday, Cheryl and I went to Central Park to watch the Broadway Show League.  It was hot; we ended up mostly watching South Pacific beat out 9 To 5, sitting with Laura Osnes (Nellie) who didn't play, but was nice enough to show up to route the team on.

Some random celeb sightings: Senator Bill Bradley, Tim Robbins, and Michael Emerson.  Oddly, this is the second Emerson sighting for me.  On another visit to NYC a couple of years ago, I saw him too.  This time it was in the 23rd St. subway; he was with wife and kid.

Anyway, some shows to see this weekend, including 9 to 5, and Waiting for Godot.  Lots of sailors in town (it's Fleet Week), but they don't sing and dance like in On The Town.

You Would Think All I Own Is A Blue Shirt And Jeans...

but it's just a costume....

The Nebula of Georgia -- Less Than Two Weeks Away

Gearing up for our NYC production in two weeks.  The online version of our program is now posted here.

Big Media Me

Interview/promo on Fox 8 went well this morning, I thought.  I'll try to have a viideo (or link) up soon.  I'm not sure if Fox 8 will put up the clip.  Their website seems obsessed with the strawberry pie segment of the Morning Show which immediately preceded us.

For What It's Worth

As of today, I'm the exact same age (down to the day) as JFK when he was killed.

He accomplished a little bit more than I have....

I'm Always Looking For Subjects For A Play For Me To Write

I think I found one.

Sometimes I Worry About My Friends

Someone very near and dear to me is in love with Ben Linus, the charactor on Lost. 

Mind you -- not in love with Michael Emerson, the actor who portrays Ben Linus, but Ben Linus.

Ben Linus, who is not only a murderer, but a fictional murderer at that.

I'm going to watch my back around her....

But seriously, Lost is getting pretty good.  Unfortunately, I missed a few shows in Season 3 and 4, and I'm not quite sure I follow everything.  Then again, maybe I'm not supposed to.

An Open Letter To Freida Pinto

Dear Freida,

Loved you in Slumdog. 

I read here that you don't have an Oscar date.

I just wanted you to know I'm not doing anything this coming Sunday evening.  Leave a comment to this post so I know how to contact you.  Or email.

Yours, Ken

Broadway Bound?

Who would have thunk it?

I might be making my Broadway debut in May.

No kidding.

I workshopped a show at Open Space Theatre last year -- an original play called "The Nebula of Georgia".  And now it's going to be staged (with the original cast, as best as possible) at the Manhattan Repertory Theatre on May 20, 21, 22.

Okay, it's not actually a Broadway house.  It's technically off-off-Broadway (which I've done many times).  But it's right in the theater district.... so, you know, close enough.

I don't know all the details, so I don't know if I can commit.  But it's kind of exciting.

My Dogs Mentioned In "Blondie"

Weird:

NYU Law School's New Curve

Sure... now they give out A-pluses.  Couldn't have done that 15 or so years ago*?

* Not that I would have gotten any....

You Are What You Blog

Typealyzer ingests the contents of your blog, and based on that, does Myers-Briggs psychology test on the blogs author.

So this is me:

ISTP - The Mechanics

The independent and problem-solving type. They are especially attuned to the demands of the moment are masters of responding to challenges that arise spontaneously. They generelly prefer to think things out for themselves and often avoid inter-personal conflicts.

The Mechanics enjoy working together with other independent and highly skilled people and often like seek fun and action both in their work and personal life. They enjoy adventure and risk such as in driving race cars or working as policemen and firefighters.

Not bad.  I'm actually an INTP.  And the S-N is borderline.

Oh, and then there's this...

Good to know.

But like others, I wonder:

Methinks the web is getting too smart for its own good. Granted, my personality type probably isn't too hard to figure out even from a 30-second conversation, but it's a little unnerving that some heap of silicon can do it. If they can already do this, how long will it be before our robot overlords take over completely?

Google Street Me

For those interested, the Google Street View people must have swung through my neighborhood this summer.

Check out the Google map of my home address, and then click "Street View".  Then click on the little "yellow man" icon to see the view from my street.  You will see this:

 

I know, you can't make it out.  The sun was behind my house that day.  The mailbox is barely visible (I replaced that mailbox in August), and the driveway (between the mailbox and the phone utility box thingee) is barely visible.  My house itself is totally obscured by the tree in the center of the photo.

On Google Maps, you can drag the little man around to try to change the view, but the other views aren't any better.

I guess I'm surprised, because there are quite a few areas of the country haven't been Google Street Viewed yet. (See map of the east coast below -covered areas are in blue)

 

The Latest On Me

For those who have inquired....

First of all, thank you for your concern.

Secondly, I am going to have colon surgery at some point.  The date keeps getting pushed back.  The damage is serious, but fortunately (and this is the good news learned this week) not widespread.  This means the surgery can be done laproscopically.

But the date is looking like sometime in January or February.  In one sense, this is good: it means the doctors don't feel a sense of urgency (technically, I've been taken out of the Trauma Unit's files as of this week).  On the other hand, it just means that this whole mish-a-goss (not a real word) is being prolonged.

Anyway, I'm mentally taking a respite from the whole issue, to the extent that my innards will allow me.

My New Phobia

People are afraid of stupid things.  I know someone who is afraid of driving over bridges, even ones that are merely overpasses.

I, on the other hand, am afraid of ice.  Not ice cubes (that would be really stupid), or even ice on the road or sidewalk.  I'm afraid of ice on ponds, rivers.  More specifically, I'm afraid of falling through ice.  Something in a past life, I think.

And now I have a new fear.

That Ira Glass will call me and shame me because I haven't donated to NPR.  He's doing that now; I heard him this morning.

Call Me Howie

So I sat down at 4:00 pm to play a game of online poker.

$11.00 entry fee for 3,000 chips.  2,907 players in an elimination tournament, which means the later you get eliminated, the more of the prize pool you win.

9 hours and 40 minutes later (yes, 1:40 am) one guy was standing with over 17,000,000 chips.

Me.

I won $15,227.90.

Good, because I have medical bills.

Where Are The Ashfords?

APM = Ashfords Per Million

Top Countries

Country APM UNITED KINGDOM 95.51 AUSTRALIA 71.84 NEW ZEALAND 68.67 CANADA 40.8 UNITED STATES 27.76 LUXEMBOURG 8.5 IRELAND 3.77 DENMARK 0.98 BELGIUM 0.86 SWITZERLAND 0.64

Top Regions

Area Name APM WEST MIDLANDS , UNITED KINGDOM 205.79 SOUTH WEST , UNITED KINGDOM 193.53 EAST ANGLIA , UNITED KINGDOM 185.88 NORTHERN TERRITORY , AUSTRALIA 168.34 WALES , UNITED KINGDOM 154.79 MISSISSIPPI , UNITED STATES 143.45 QUEENSLAND , AUSTRALIA 100.86 LOUISIANA , UNITED STATES 95 OKLAHOMA , UNITED STATES 90.08 AUSTRALIAN CAPITAL TERRITORY , AUSTRALIA 87.94

Top Cities

City BEMBRIDGE , SOUTH EAST , UNITED KINGDOM APPIN , SCOTLAND , UNITED KINGDOM BILSTON , WEST MIDLANDS , UNITED KINGDOM BAGILLT & FLINT , WALES , UNITED KINGDOM BATHGATE , SCOTLAND , UNITED KINGDOM AIKEN , SOUTH CAROLINA , UNITED STATES ASCOT , SOUTH EAST , UNITED KINGDOM BILLERICAY , SOUTH EAST , UNITED KINGDOM ASHFORD & SURREY , SOUTH EAST , UNITED KINGDOM BACUP , NORTH WEST , UNITED KINGDOM

Source: World Names Profiler

Forever Young

Being stuck in a hospital has caused me to be a bit nostalgic.  So I've decided to upload my yearbook photos from years gone by.....

1950

1956

1960

1964

1970

1974

1978

1984

1988

1990

1994

2000

Sicko

Cheryl managed to smuggle in my laptop and I've hacked in to the Wake Forest Baptist Hospital computer, so I can inform the outside world of what's going on.

Actually, Cheryl carried in my laptop and that have free Internet access....

What's going on is.... hell if I know.

I went to my GP on Friday.  It was my second visit to him since the whole ER experience from the previous week, in which it was learned that I had an infected colon from diverticulitis.  The doctors had sent me home with some strong oral antibiotics.

After the results of some blood tests, it was clear to my GP that the antibiotics were not helping.  In fact, the raised white blood cell count indicated that, if anything, the infection in my colon was getting worse.  So he said to go back to the emergency room.

So, another Friday night, another visit to the LOVELY Wake Forest Baptist Hospital ER.  Xrays, CT Scans.

I was admitted to the hospital this time.  The two issues are these:

(1)  The infection, which was apparently so massive as to block all digestive "movement" and

(2)  The damage to the colon itself.

Now, as for #2, there's not much to say because damage cannot be assessed until the infection is down.  It LOOKS like, from all indications, they will have to remove a section of my colon (making it a semicolon).   That operation will happen in a few weeks, all other things pending.  (The alternative to that is a collostemy bag, which is NOT cool).

So the focus here is on #1, which consists of me taking some IV antibiotics.  Plus, to clear out pressure from behind the infection/obstruction, they inserted a tube through my nose, down my throat and into my stomach to pump out bile or whatever.  This hellish thing has been running through my nose and into my stomach for about 40 hours now, and I hate it.

To speed up the process, it looked like they were going to insert a needle, but that might be on hold.

In any event, it's getting better through the slow process of IV antibiotics.

But I could be here many more days.  Just lying here.

Probably wont do much blogging since im not paying attention to things and this isnt particualrly interesting

\

Yeah, So I Collapsed At Work...

...and was taken by ambulance to the emergency room, where I hung out for nine hours all told, and then was finally sent home me with the news that I had a ruptured colon.  [CLARIFICATION:  Ok, not that I had a ruptured colon.... more like an infected colon which could rupture if it hasn't already, so I have to take anti biotics and anti-inflammatories.....]

Which means I probably won't be much help in the team and individual qualifying events.

**** UPDATE -- 8/14/08  9:15pm --

Still recuperating.  I have written in my mind an absolutely hysterical blog "pamphlet" entitled "SO YOU WANT TO HAVE DIVERTICULITIS", based on my experiences.  Sadly, it's probably too nasty, and I lack the energy anyway.

Bottom line -- light blogging for the next few days.  I woould love to share my feelings about many things (i.e., the Edwards affair -- disappointing), but que sera sera.

Got MILFs

Judy Pike, a dear old friend from from Tufts, turns -- and I'm estimating here, based on the fact that she was a senior when I was a freshman -- 49 years old today.

Suzanne Evon, an ex-girlfriend and even more endearing current friend, turns 50 this coming weekend.

What happened?  When did we get old?

I mean, I can deal with me getting older, slowing down, having sciatic pains, etc.  My whole life, I've been aware that that stuff was going to happen... eventually.  I mean, I can read a play and see a great part for a mid-twenty year old, and say "Oh, wait.  I'm not the right age".  I can do that now.  I used to not be able to.

But my contemporaries getting older?  Turning a half frickin' century?

Shit, I didn't see that coming...

I guess, in my mind, 50 is about how old my mom is now.  Which she isn't but... that's my mind.  And then everyone else's age is supposed to fall in accordingly.  It probably doesn't help that I have teenagers and twenty-somethings in my life who I can relate to (i.e., talk the lingo, or whatever -- although realistically I'm probably just a poser to them).

So when I contemplate Que Evon turning 50, something in my head short circuits.

Saving grace is that it doesn't show in either Que or Judy.  But still... that number... five-zero.  Yikes.

It's Friday

I got nothing....

UPDATE:  Okay, I got something.

A Flickr user filming the heavy rain gets hit by lightning.  Happened a few days ago:

She writes: "From what i understand, it went through my left hand holding the camera, crossed my back and exited out of my right hand holding onto the metal railing. No entry or exit wounds, just a really good zap!"

But No Superhuman Abilty To Wage Mind Control

Human Resources at the place I work is asking employees to take a Clifton Strengthfinder Test, to show our strengths and talents.  It's a serious psychological test (not one of those BS internet things).  It assesses your strengths, giving you five "talents" out of 36 metrics.

Here's my results:

Learner

You love to learn. The subject matter that interests you most will be determined by your other themes and experiences, but whatever the subject, you will always be drawn to the process of learning. The process, more than the content or the result, is especially exciting for you. You are energized by the steady and deliberate journey from ignorance to competence. The thrill of the first few facts, the early efforts to recite or practice what you have learned, the growing confidence of a skill mastered—this is the process that entices you. Your excitement leads you to engage in adult learning experiences—yoga or piano lessons or graduate classes. It enables you to thrive in dynamic work environments where you are asked to take on short project assignments and are expected to learn a lot about the new subject matter in a short period of time and then move on to the next one. This Learner theme does not necessarily mean that you seek to become the subject matter expert, or that you are striving for the respect that accompanies a professional or academic credential. The outcome of the learning is less significant than the “getting there.”

Ideation

You are fascinated by ideas. What is an idea? An idea is a concept, the best explanation of the most events. You are delighted when you discover beneath the complex surface an elegantly simple concept to explain why things are the way they are. An idea is a connection. Yours is the kind of mind that is always looking for connections, and so you are intrigued when seemingly disparate phenomena can be linked by an obscure connection. An idea is a new perspective on familiar challenges. You revel in taking the world we all know and turning it around so we can view it from a strange but strangely enlightening angle. You love all these ideas because they are profound, because they are novel, because they are clarifying, because they are contrary, because they are bizarre. For all these reasons you derive a jolt of energy whenever a new idea occurs to you. Others may label you creative or original or conceptual or even smart. Perhaps you are all of these. Who can be sure? What you are sure of is that ideas are thrilling. And on most days this is enough.

Input

You are inquisitive. You collect things. You might collect information—words, facts, books, and quotations—or you might collect tangible objects such as butterflies, baseball cards, porcelain dolls, or sepia photographs. Whatever you collect, you collect it because it interests you. And yours is the kind of mind that finds so many things interesting. The world is exciting precisely because of its infinite variety and complexity. If you read a great deal, it is not necessarily to refine your theories but, rather, to add more information to your archives. If you like to travel, it is because each new location offers novel artifacts and facts. These can be acquired and then stored away. Why are they worth storing? At the time of storing it is often hard to say exactly when or why you might need them, but who knows when they might become useful? With all those possible uses in mind, you really don’t feel comfortable throwing anything away. So you keep acquiring and compiling and filing stuff away. It’s interesting. It keeps your mind fresh. And perhaps one day some of it will prove valuable.

Individualization

Your Individualization theme leads you to be intrigued by the unique qualities of each person. You are impatient with generalizations or “types” because you don’t want to obscure what is special and distinct about each person. Instead, you focus on the differences between individuals. You instinctively observe each person’s style, each person’s motivation, how each thinks, and how each builds relationships. You hear the one-of-a-kind stories in each person’s life. This theme explains why you pick your friends just the right birthday gift, why you know that one person prefers praise in public and another detests it, and why you tailor your teaching style to accommodate one person’s need to be shown and another’s desire to “figure it out as I go.” Because you are such a keen observer of other people’s strengths, you can draw out the best in each person. This Individualization theme also helps you build productive teams. While some search around for the perfect team “structure” or “process,” you know instinctively that the secret to great teams is casting by individual strengths so that everyone can do a lot of what they do well.

Intellection

You like to think. You like mental activity. You like exercising the “muscles” of your brain, stretching them in multiple directions. This need for mental activity may be focused; for example, you may be trying to solve a problem or develop an idea or understand another person’s feelings. The exact focus will depend on your other strengths. On the other hand, this mental activity may very well lack focus. The theme of Intellection does not dictate what you are thinking about; it simply describes that you like to think. You are the kind of person who enjoys your time alone because it is your time for musing and reflection. You are introspective. In a sense you are your own best companion, as you pose yourself questions and try out answers on yourself to see how they sound. This introspection may lead you to a slight sense of discontent as you compare what you are actually doing with all the thoughts and ideas that your mind conceives. Or this introspection may tend toward more pragmatic matters such as the events of the day or a conversation that you plan to have later. Wherever it leads you, this mental hum is one of the constants of your life.

Whatever.  Below the fold is all 34 themes for me, in order...

Why I Keep Walking Around In Circles

Turns out, my right leg is longer than my left one.  Been that way my whole life.

Also explains my current back problems.

How To Upstage Heather Maggs

(1)  Show up at my place of work (ostensibly to see Grandma)

(2)  Be cute as a button, with strawberry blonde hair

(3)  Sleep and be an all around angel

(4)  Be named Cassie

Oh, yeah.  It was great seeing you too, Heather....

Cassie Maggs

Something disconcerting about a 3 week old resting on a "Debbie Does Dallas" T-shirt:

But seriously, lots of pic here.

Congratulations....

...to the valedictorian of Edwards Little High School, Auburn Maine, -- Zachary Dumont!

Sis And Family In The Paper

Must not be much going on in Auburn Maine.

My sister and her family attended the local Empty Bowls Supper, and it made the newspaper.  (I went to the Empty Bowl luncheon last week here in Winston-Salem).  As the article notes, my nephew Zach was unable to attend.

But not to worry -- his whereabouts were covered in another article in the same newspaper....

Lee Ann As Marie Osmond

Cracks me up....

S'up?

You would think that after not blogging for a couple of days, I would have something to write about.  Not so.  Been busy with work, Whorehouse rehearsal, getting ready for the closing week of Nebula of Georgia, late night chats, and so on.

Missed the debate last night.  Apparently it was a travesty, with emphasis on gaffes and gotchas, and almost no questions on policy or substance.  Sigh.  Better media please.  Atrocity of the debate aside, apparently neither did well, with Obama doing worse (probably because it was pile-on night).  Most people I've read thought the winner was McCain.  Great.

Not paying attention to the news.  Again, better media please.

Not even paying attention to the Red Sox.

Heather's got some pictures though.

Baby News [Bumped and Promoted]

Heather is delivering her baby today, after staying up all night with contractions.  Looks like her husband Jeff was live-blogging it from the hospital this morning (they're still waiting around as of 8:45 am), although as the day goes on, I suspect he will have better things to do.

Thought and prayers to the two three of them.

UPDATE:  Cassandra Christine Maggs. Born this 14th day of April 2008 at 11:48am, weighing 6lbs. 2oz. at New York Presbyterian Hospital.  Pictures here.

"The Nebula of Georgia" Is A Hit!

Very positive review from the Greensboro News and Record (sorry, only dead-tree version), praising every cast member as well as the play itself:

"familiar characters in a fun dramedy...southern flavor penned by a damn Yankee...it's easy to see this enjoyable show becoming a staple for the theatre...characters are well drawn and familiar...this show is likely to sell out!"

Gotta love that!

It's been selling very well -- not sold out, unfortunately -- but it is very popular already!

Opening Night

Little nervous about "The Nebula of Georgia" -- it's a new space for me -- but I think it's going to be pretty good.  Advance sales are doing well.....

Congrats To The New Jumbo!

At my undergrad alma mater, Tufts University, there sits a cannon on the hilltop by the chapel, a gift from the City of Medford to Tufts University in 1956.

In 1977, some joker painted the cannon with a political slogan, and a Tufts tradition was started.  Since them, the cannon has been painted and repainted countless times for birthdays, to announce events, etc.  I myself painted the cannon a couple of times.

This being the digital age, you can now paint the cannon online, which is just what my sister did to announce some exciting family news....

My nephew, Zachary Dumont is following the footsteps of his mother (my sister), his father, and his uncle (me).  He was admitted to, and apparently is accepting, enrollment in Tufts University.

Congrats, Zach!

From The Family Archives

Is there anything better than a family member finding old faded photographs?

Uncle Jack uncovered a trove.  You don't have to know these people to enjoy these photos.  They invoke what I imagine to be a simpler time, if only because the world was black sepia and white back then.

"The Rough Riders"

That's my Uncle Jack, my Mom, and Debby Van Dyke, with Jill Jane (Debby's dog).  The still photograph camera ("picture machine") had just been invented. 

"Show Us Your Kneecaps!"

Mother and Uncle Jack in 1943.  My mother's hair was blonde when she was younger.  This was at a time when girls wore dresses.  It was also customary at the time for young boys to wear wide belts and shorts hiked up to their chest.  Fun fact: This is the last known photo of my mother in which she had her eyes open.

"Fighting Over The Remote"

My mother and Uncle Jack roughhousing, during the McCarthy Era.  Moments after this photo was taken, Jack Webb appeared out of nowhere and warned everybody about the evils of "the Red Menace".

"Twas Beauty Killed The Beast"

This is my mother.  You can tell from her hairstyle that she was performing in USO shows at the time. 

In this picture, she is strangling the family dog (Clancy).  It was a phase; she outgrew it I'm told.  Although, I find it odd that after all us kids went off to college, the family cat -- who had been just fine all the years we grew up in that house -- suddenly "died".  Hmmmmm....

UPDATED to make corrections and additions.  Mater would like me to know that she does NOT appreciate photos posted of her in which she is wearing her pajamas, so let's all pretend that she's wearing a kimono.

Swamped

Light and/or intermittant blogging for a while.

Work is a bear.  And I'm in rehearsal for two shows:

(1)  The Nebula of Georgia, playing at Open Space Theatre on April 10-12, and April 17-19, Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays at 8:00 p.m.; Sunday at 2:00 (for tix and information, call 336-292-2285).  I play Lyndal, a goofy filling station owner in rural Georgia, in a comic drama about a family coming to terms with their past.

and

(2)  The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, presented by Winston-Salem Theatre Alliance, May 9-18, to be performed at SECCA, Winston-Salem.  Times and information to come (although you can always call 336-768-7655).  I play the Governor of Texas (played by Charles Durning in the film).  And yes, I do this number:

Don't ask me how I plan to do this....

Just A Little Too Much Time On My Hands....

Me as James Bond....

Me as Muhammad Ali....

Me as Sweeney Todd...

Me as Austin Powers....

Me as Brad Pitt escorting Angelina Jolie to the Golden Globes

And the MOST DISTURBING OF ALL.....

Me as Kate Moss in a Dior ad...

For The Record, I've Never Been To Australia

Must be someone else:

More than 65,000 WA volunteers resisted a Sunday sleep-in to collect 520 tonnes of rubbish yesterday morning for the 19th Clean Up Australia Day.
 
Community groups and individual volunteers tended to rivers, bush and beaches to remove glass, drink cans, confectionery wrappers, cigarette butts and other discarded rubbish.
   
Clean Up Australia Day chairman Ian Kiernan used the day to congratulate the South Australian Government on becoming the first State to introduce a ban on all plastic bags by the end of the year.
   
He called for a national plastic bag ban and public recycling systems to address waste problems Australia-wide.
   
***
   
Mr Templeman said about $16 million was spent cleaning up litter every year and called on people to dob in litterbugs. About 2500 fines were issued in 2006-2007.
   
Down at Minim Cove park in Mosman Park, about 30 people helped fill a skip bin with rubbish and weeds from surrounding bush.
   
Ken Ashford dug out century plants which are not native to area.
   
“It is great to see so many people out and about,” he said.
   
“It shows that we don’t just whinge to the government to do things, we too don’t mind getting our hands dirty for the good of the community.
   
“I would like to see local governments plan days like this quarterly and get even more people involved.”

Don't know what "whinge" means.  Probably sounds cool when it's said with an Aussie accent.

That Yeats Could Turn A Phrase

When by my solitary hearth I sit,
When no fair dreams before my “mind’s eye” flit,
And the bare heath of life presents no bloom;
Sweet Hope, ethereal balm upon me shed,
And wave thy silver pinions o’er my head.

Whene’er I wander, at the fall of night,
Where woven boughs shut out the moon’s bright ray,
Should sad Despondency my musings fright,
And frown, to drive fair Cheerfulness away,
Peep with the moon-beams through the leafy roof,
And keep that fiend Despondence far aloof.

Should Disappointment, parent of Despair,
Strive for her son to seize my careless heart;
When, like a cloud, he sits upon the air,
Preparing on his spell-bound prey to dart:
Chase him away, sweet Hope, with visage bright,
And fright him as the morning frightens night!

Whene’er the fate of those I hold most dear
Tells to my fearful breast a tale of sorrow,
O bright-eyed Hope, my morbid fancy cheer;
Let me awhile thy sweetest comforts borrow:
Thy heaven-born radiance around me shed,
And wave thy silver pinions o’er my head!

Should e’er unhappy love my bosom pain,
From cruel parents, or relentless fair;
O let me think it is not quite in vain
To sigh out sonnets to the midnight air!
Sweet Hope, ethereal balm upon me shed,
And wave thy silver pinions o’er my head!

In the long vista of the years to roll,
Let me not see our country’s honour fade:
O let me see our land retain her soul,
Her pride, her freedom; and not freedom’s shade.
From thy bright eyes unusual brightness shed—
Beneath thy pinions canopy my head!

Let me not see the patriot’s high bequest,
Great Liberty! how great in plain attire!
With the base purple of a court oppress’d,
Bowing her head, and ready to expire:
But let me see thee stoop from heaven on wings
That fill the skies with silver glitterings!

And as, in sparkling majesty, a star
Gilds the bright summit of some gloomy cloud;
Brightening the half veil’d face of heaven afar:
So, when dark thoughts my boding spirit shroud,
Sweet Hope, celestial influence round me shed,
Waving thy silver pinions o’er my head.

Anatomy Of A Brainfart

Scene:  A group of Klansman storm the lodge where Charlie, an Englishman pretending to be a foreigner, is staying.  The robed and hooded men are armed with rifles, bats, crowbars, etc.  The leader of the racist Klan, Owen Musser, raises a bullhorn to his mouth and addresses Betty (the owner of the lodge) with the following line:

Are you prepared this night to stand before the holy tribunal of the Invisible Empire?

It's a little bit of an awkward line, especially coming from an illiterate redneck like Owen Musser.  But it's never given me any problems.  I don't worry about getting it 100% accurate, especially since I repeat it seconds later with:

Are you prepared, woman, to stand this night before the holy tribunal of the Invisible Empire?

Note how this night and to stand are inverted the second time.  But sometimes I invert them the first time.  No biggie.  Means the same thing.  Audience doesn't know or care.

But last night, in front of a preview show crowd of about 200, I totally blanked on that first line: Are you prepared this night to stand before the holy tribunal of the Invisible Empire?

Here's what went through my head as I raised the bullhorn and opened my mouth to speak:

Are you prepared... Yes, it's are you prepared.  Not are you ready as in are you read to rumble.  It's Are you prepared to.  To stand.  To stand or this night?  Which is it?  Doesn't matter.  I feel like to stand.  Wait.  To stand *what*?  Oh, she's standing trial.  You "stand trial" -- that's the phrase.  Isn't the word "trial" in here?  No, it's not "trial".  It's "tribunal".  Wait, but you don't "stand tribunal".  That doesn't make any sense.  Oh, my God.  I'm not saying anything. I have to say something.  The shark is dying.  Jeez!

"Are you prepared to...."

Good.  You've got that out.  Wait.  You're pausing.  Ohmigod.  You're forgetting this line.  What was it?  "Stand trial"?  Isn't there something about a trial?  Shit.  Um, um...

"Um.. are you..."

Uh oh.  Red alert.  Red alert.  For god sake's say something!  Okay.  Think.  The line is about a trial with the Invisible Empire.  The holy Invisible Empire.  No, it's not the holy Invisible Empire.  That doesn't make sense.  But what's holy?  A holy trial?  No, there's no trial.  Is there?  Trial?  Tribunal?  Does it really make a difference?  Seconds are ticking away.  Oh, dammit.  What is wrong with me?  I've never had a problem with this line.  And I've turned in a good performance so far this show.  You know what?  I bet it's the caffeine.  You drink two cans of Coke in this play and now you're wired.  Your brain's overloaded.  Oh, don't think about that now, for Chrissakes.  You really shouldn't have watched the video of your performance in Little Shop before coming to the theater tonight.  Seriously.  It's got you self-conscious.  Wait.  Where's my head at?  Hello?  You're soooo not in the moment.  Get it together.  You've got a couple hundred people looking at you.  How long have I been standing here speechless?  A second maybe.  Maybe two.  Feels like a minute.  Shoot!  Say yer damn line.  What is it again?  Oh shoot.  You know the gist of what you're supposed to say.  Just say something, dammit.

"Um...Are you prepared to have a trial with the Invisible Empire?"

Have a trial?!?  What the fuck is that?  Did I just say that?  Jesus, you're choking.  How amateurish.  Oh, Good.  Pat is saying her line now.  Get it together man.  You have a second shot at this.  You say this line twice in a row, more or less.  Don't think.  Just say.

"Are you prepared, woman, to stand this night before the holy tribunal of the Invisible Empire?"

Got it.  I think.  Did I get it?  Shoot.  Put it behind you.  Keep going.

Of course, all this happened within a matter of seconds.  But as any actor knows, it seemed like hours.

Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, the play went pretty well, and we all agreed it was nice to finally finally have an audience.  It's rare that a show is ready as early as ours.  Usually, you work out the kinks right up to (and including) opening night.  But we were ready last week.  In fact, we were at risk of getting stale.  So it was nice to have a preview crowd (they see it for free -- mostly invited people from retirement homes, etc.).

I'm enjoying this show.  Being a racist Klansman, I play the "heavy", which isn't my favorite kind of role.  Stan has added some "gags" for me, and I'm not entirely in agreement with his call on that.  In my view, I'm the straight character; everyone else gets the comedy.  I see my role as being akin to the Germans in Life Is Beautiful, rather than the Germans in Hogan's Heroes. 

Not that I don't mind shtick -- I personally love it.  I just don't think people are going to find it funny.  Oh, they do in rehearsal, but audiences aren't theatre people.  I think they're going to be taken aback by the robes and hoods at the dramatic climax toward the end of Act II.  So, little sight gags coming from me (at that point) are simply going to thud.  I also don't think it works structurally.  The whole play is comedy comedy comedy comedy, and then comes a VERY serious moment (which turns back in to comedy).  I don't agree with Stan's call to make that serious moment "light" in any way.

But what do I know?  We'll give it a whirl.  Stan's got a better bead and far more experience about these things.  And I'm usually wrong about what "works" and what doesn't, at least with North Carolina audiences.

That said, The Foreigner opens tonight.  Information is here.  This is a cast of seasoned veterans.  There's not a weak link in the bunch.  The play is VERY funny, and we've got this baby paced to within an inch of its life.  We're expecting a good response.  People are loving it so far.

And I won't go up on my lines.  I promise.

Green

Sometime next month, I'm doing a stage reading of a one-act play called Green by Bekah Brunstetter.  It's about a soldier named Clint, returning from the Iraq war, learning to adjust (not very successfuly -- he holds conversations with his gun and cigarettes, who talk back). 

I play Alex, the soldier's best buddy from childhood.  Alex is artistic, liberal, anti-war, and 22 years old.  (I may have a problem pulling that last one off).  He's also kind of a dick -- no problem pulling that last one off.  A typical exchange:

ALEX:  Actually, uh, fuck no, Clint.  It's real stuff.  Like did you know that the government totally monopolizes everything and turns us into these robotic consuming voting machines?  Wait, so you got to vote when you were over there, right?

CLINT:  Yeah, we voted.

ALEX:  I mean, I assumed yeah, but - how messed up would that be, if you guys didn't get to?  Man.  At least you're back.  At least you didn't end up some kinda faux martyr for some duies's cause, I mean, Fucking Bush.  Sending like 300,000 more troops over as we speak.  Saw it on CNN, cross-eyed murderer, he--

The play itself isn't a political polemic about Bush/Iraq, but my character is.  And a rather annoying one at that -- the kind of liberal who think he knows all there is to know about all matters political, simply because he saw a Michael Moore film.

Ms. Brunstetter is an upcoming/struggling playwright in NYC.  In her introspective blog, she wrote this about Green last November:

Blurb:

When Clint returns from Iraq to his strangely liberal bible belt college community, Alex, his Bush-trash talking best friend, and Rhea, Alex’s confused and beautiful girlfriend await him with baited breath. Clint wants to settle back down into normal life, but his memories of his experiences at war make this adjustment harder for him than he ever anticipated.  Green is a fresh look at the high price of service, using magical realism and an amorous anthropomorphized fire-arm.

Something like that.

Lil’ Green has had quite the life: produced (as our first production ever) by WMC in 2004 - read in NYU’s HotINK festival of New Plays 2007 - finalist for the Tennesee Williams New Orleans Literary Festival 2007 - semi - finalist for ONeill Playwright’s conference 2007 - National Finalist, Kennedy Center American College Theater Festival 2007 - and now the Kendeda thing, through Atlanta’s Alliance theater - with a reading presented in conjuction with SPF and Fox Theatricals.

What I need to remember about this play is that I wasn’t thinking when I wrote it. That shows, yes, for sure - lots of things in it sort of lack poor planning, but: I had no agenda. I was just having fun and wrestling with something that confused/intrigued me. I think this is the correct way to enter a first draft, with no calculation. Maybe?

The agency I have been a-courtin for sometime is trying to find  the ‘money project’ that might come from these stubby fingers - something I muster up in down time, some dramaplay fed by cheap white wine, white girl angst and a delightful, whimsical perspective on humanity.

It might be Green. It wasn’t You may Go Now, it wasn’t Walls - maybe - I hope - please - it will be this. The guy who’s directing a reading of it through the Alliance Theater Kendeda reading series - Rajendra Maharaj - an amazing director who’s working at the Goodman  - is represented by this Agency, and is going to get them in the door to see it. Le Yay! I feel like pants need to be wowed until they are off.

People, I feel pressure. The good kind that makes impromptu birthday cakes happen in the span of two hours; the kind that makes your heart race and your product good.

I feel this is my chance to blow it, or not blow it. Over the next week, I will be squeezing writey time between work and babysitting to re-enter this story, find the humanity, make it fresh. Perhaps the gun and the cigarette will make out. Perhaps someone will monologue about oil prices, perhaps I will channel three years ago, and the things I then felt. I think it’s actually a story about comfort, and feeling comfortable in ignorance - I think it’s about home?  We shall see.

In conclusion, I have decided that everything is important - nothing is no big deal.

Nice to do something contemporary and "arty".  Should be fun.

Things You Didn't Know About Me

In fact, didn't know it about myself...

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